1. |
spirit
05:55
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spirits ascends in offering
drenched in light, bewildering
bottle of wine and some lethargy
washed out fragrance, spiral spinning
cause and effect your sequencing
what does it mean to be living?
shadow in the dark, your mirrored face
waves in droves they float through grates
and i swore that you were there
at least your face seemed so familiar
and i called when I woke
but you weren't home
i just wanted you to know
that our future is happening now
there is a love we can't know about
held into your darkest thoughts
kept alive, some open box
braving a place we'd swore we'd be
among all our cells regenerating
history in your head so moved
by the wind and it's gift to you
and to your love
that i may never know
it hurts to think of those impossibilities
while you will forever be you
no secrets, no shame
i will always love you
"i wanna be a blue ribbon living in the city
learn the difference between love and disease
i think i got enough to live for but i always want more
now i'm afraid of the metaphor in almost everything"
memory hanging by a thread
moment kept, erased when dead
vacant expression that's been cast
tiny dancer, do we ever come back?
only to become all that we've known
you are christ, satan, and the unknown
swirling around in an abstract flow
all at once we begin to know
that the stars, they are just stars
and there is no question of their brilliance
and you might forever be "you"
and it shakes me on how you swim
through time and live
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2. |
water/memory
04:28
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dark thoughts, white room
mask off, untrue
development personalities
in our skin it counts a few
obsessive, a demise
that's one way to go
give one last try to christ
just so my mother knows
it's way late
there's no use for crying now
heard the radio broadcast hymn
it was much too loud
let those prayers hold my name
let the sisyphean game be played
on that hill
light thoughts, dark room
mask on, come composed
if there is one truth we all know
it's that the dead don't come home
technicolor dreams love
winter tear, an abyss above
what summer is a blue sky
when in the depths there are no eyes
to conflate the use
of these images now
saw an old photo of you laughing
as clutching a cloud
held this totem in my hands
felt like centuries
counting in the sand
when you were mine
were you ever mine
drone beat, timpani roll
sound of suffering comes in droves
in a club where we dance
to a future we can't know
i close my eyes, see your face
stretched almost like code
through the moving spectacle
adjusts like a digitized ghost
in a stream
the river comes pouring out
felt time fall through my hands
like a thirsty mouth
i had a dream
that you were a home
stood at the door
with butterflied hope
you said
i'm glad you arrive
and i walked inside
i was glad that i arrived
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3. |
lawn
03:14
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you stand on the lawn and
you remember them somehow
though the faces are faint
the names are unclear
while the copper sky
lingers like old reasoning
like the way this house once stood
before time nearly tore it down
and down here
we hold eachother close
overweight burden
communing the unknown
and down here
we share it all
cramp in tiny houses
reciting prayers
worshipping old gods
can you stop by
your grandmas house
your aunt will let you in
if you knock on the door
and they will ask
if you are hungry
you will tell them yes and
then when they ask about me
tell them
that I aint angry
that I aint suffering
that I got my vices in check
and you tell them
that i'm doing much better
that i talk too much
just make it believable
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4. |
bible
03:38
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i got to leave with a few memories
some warrants, a love, an old pen
a bible i don't much believe in
but that i read when i get the chance
and that old air is mystifying
maybe it's the way it flows through my hands
while there's an essence that is creeping
i can't say i'd wanna go back there again
where edit lost her faith
where goliath fell to the floor
where daniel had visions of the end
where solomon lost their sword
and to the trauma or fleeting feelings
to the old friends that must watch me drown
grandest of kisses that now mean nothing
to the abstactions that hold me together now
for all the things i must commune back
to a fever heard and a vacant isle
to return to a surpressed nothing
a void of meaning that must still haunt me now
the three had cut their string
rosaline stayed unknown
eurydice was cast back down
llorona never could atone
and to tread into the carnivorous dark
or the illusion that we must choose
may there be clarity where there once was fog
and may the journey towards death be long and kind to you
baldwin communed with the fates
didion voyaged into grief
borges had lost his sight
and dysmas became the good thief
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precious human Brooklyn, New York
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